Alright, fellow money nerds – I feel like having some fun today. After all, it’s Christmas Day and I bet none of you are actually reading this anyway. But, that’s okay. I don’t expect you to. Not today.

Over the past several weeks, I’ve kept a tally of realizations about early retirement that, well, are pretty darn consistent among those of us who’ve pulled the plug on our professional careers. 

Some of these are probably obvious while others may not be so clear-cut. But, they are all observations that I’ve had since pulling the cord. 

You ready?

You know that you’ve retired early when…

you actually look forward to Sunday night because you know that the very next day is no longer a work day. 

you can watch Monday Night Football on the East coast and not feel bad about the fact that you’ve sentenced yourself to a drag-ass morning tomorrow because the game ends so late.

every day pretty much looks the same.

you honestly have no idea what day of the week it is pretty much 100% of the time.

you no longer feel like you need a weekend, but if you ever do, you can take one whenever you damn well please.

you can work on a Friday night and not feel guilty that you’re wasting one of your two free evenings when work isn’t looming the very next day.

you no longer check your LinkedIn account and really no longer care who’s viewed your profile.

you do errands around town and wonder why there is so much damn traffic in the middle of the day, then lament the fact that more people don’t have jobs that require them to be in an office.  🙂

that $100 bill you earned last week by doing something small actually seems like a lot of money now. 

you are asked incessantly about what you do for healthcare

you are way more happy, healthy and stress-free than you were when eight to 10 hours of the most productive hours of the day were taken from you.

you quickly become amazed at the opportunities that exist in the world that you had no idea were there before.

aside from all the gifts, every morning pretty much feels like Christmas.

There it is…short and sweet. Merry Christmas. Happy Holidays. Happy New Year. Happy Festivus. Happy [fill in the blank].

BTW, if you don’t know what Festivus is…first, you must not have been a fan of Seinfeld, which happens to be my favorite television sitcom of all time.

Here’s a quick run-down of this incredible holiday:

Okay, what did I miss? You know that you’ve retired early when…