Dear Boss – I quit! Love, Me

30 thoughts on “Dear Boss – I quit! Love, Me”

  1. Haha — Thank you for the nice dose of sarcasm! 🙂 I write some version of this letter in my head at least once a month, often when driving to or Ubering to an airport following some pointless meeting that has dragged me halfway across the country for all of, oh, 20 minutes of someone’s time. Even better if I gave up part of a weekend or get home at midnight on a Friday night for it, which will happen this week. (Hey, at least I get to keep the frequent flyer miles!) I’m thankful to work for a company where the corporate BS seems a bit more minimal than at other places, but I’m convinced no one is immune anymore. It’s like Office Space times 10. It’s too bad The Office isn’t on the air anymore, because I think they’d have a field day with all the Silicon Valley jargon that is currently infiltrating the workplace now. “Let’s be disruptive!” “Let’s fail fast!” OMG — Can’t. Wait. To. Escape!

    1. Oh, the “lets be disruptive” phrase is probably in the T op 5 of most annoyingly-uttered phrase by those who are really, truly, unequivocally clueless. It’s especially common in small businesses, and I’ve had a lot of experience working in those environments.

      “We are disrupting the market!”

      Oh gawd, make it stop! 😉

  2. This appears to be more of “venting” than a resignation letter. Having escaped the corporate world myself essentially, all things you mention are true. With that said, they paid you to do those things. You had a choice…..you decided to stay and deal with those issues for compensation $$$$$$$$ It would be hard to hold them accountable for your misery. Glad you are taking the steps to make a change and move to the next step in your life. I’m sure it will be an improvement…..Steve

    1. Thanks Steve – this article was meant to be more of a funny-ish (but true) representation of corporate America, not necessarily a serious indictment of holding them accountable…basically, if Office Space could be distilled down into a single silly article, this would be it. 🙂

  3. LOVE IT. “It’s not you, It’s me.” 🙂 Do what I told Mr. FireStation to do… leave a cake in the breakroom with sparkler candles that says “I Quit!”

  4. A bit too much venting to my taste. I know some is being sarcastic but you can do much better than that Steve. 🙂

    Unfortunately most of the things that you mentioned in your letter I’ve experienced. 🙁

    1. Hey Tawcan – Yep, I think a lot of us can relate to many of these issues faced within the corporate environment in this country. It’s sad that they are all so darn common, too.

      Thanks for reading! 🙂

  5. Are you afraid your boss or co-workers might read your blog and see this post? I think they’d write a note in your employee file and put you as a non-rehire. Corporate companies often function like government bureaucracies.

    And yes I’ve experienced many these and more! It’s kind of sad that there are still clueless people wondering why someone quit their company. It’s like their oblivious.

    My bf works in IT too and he gets annoyed with the deadlines, he’s a software developer and he gets frustrated because they want him to write code and punch it out as fast as he can as if he’s a monkey.

    Then when any of the developers are not typing in the office but thinking about how to solve a problem, the upper bosses think that they’re not working but they are *thinking*. Writing code is also often a thinking job.

    Anyway, Steve said that you were paid to do those things and you were working there out of choice. I get that but at the same time, there is so much that can be improved on in the corporate world. These frustrations are universal, if most companies went about things better I doubt you’d see so many FIRE bloggers.

    1. Hey Jaime – I’m not worried in the least that someone might read this post. If they are exploring this kind of material, then more power to them! It’s quite healthy to think about your future by reading up on personal finance, even tongue-in-cheek articles like this one. 🙂

      I think you’re right that if things ran differently, we might not see as much of a desire to escape corporate America. Unless things begin to change a bit with how company’s define “productivity”, I’m sure the number of FIRE bloggers will steadily increase. 🙂

  6. for some reason this reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where George keeps trying to get fired from the Yankees and it keeps backfiring.. it is hilarious.. you should check it out.

    1. Ha! I’ve actually seen every episode of Seinfeld probably a thousand times, and I know exactly the episode that you’re referring to. I’m not streaking across Yankee Stadium, though. 🙂

  7. The portion about ‘all in staff’ meetings with pizza made me laugh out loud. We have one on Friday to discuss our “problem solving” worksheets. They’re supposed to be filled out to solve a problem as it occurs. Once a quarter, each department has to present one and everyone rapidly tries to figure out what they’ve done over the last three months and fill out the sheet retroactively.

    It’s a known practice that no one fills them out properly, yet everyone is compliant with the quarterly request. I have a good relationship with the organizer of the meeting and asked him if he’s aware of this, and he laughed and said yeah, no one uses the problem solving worksheet, but it’s part of continuous improvement that everyone thinks is happening.

    Oh, and this meeting is also catered with local pizza.

    If they want to pay me for an hour and a half to listen to BS and eat pizza, I’m definitely okay with that.

    1. Ha! It’s interesting how much of our time at work is spent just…going through the motions for the same of checking boxes that the company happens to care about. But why…why does it ALWAYS have to be pizza? I understand it’s an easy lunch to have catered, but come on, a little variety never hurt anyone! 🙂

  8. Though I keep saying we’re working for financial independence, not necessarily early retirement, stuff like this continues to plague my day-to-day work experience. I’ve heard “did you get my email” more times than is necessary for one’s life. You had written awhile ago that jobs are largely the same and the grass is always brown–I get it now. This culture you’ve written about is pervasive and if many of us agree, why does it persist?

    1. Hey Claudia – that’s a darn good question. I guess there is only so much that society can do when we’re dealing with larger groups of people. Schools are run largely the same way, but improvements can certainly be made. Unfortunately, it often takes a heavy hand to make it happen.

  9. I love sending an email and then walking to that person’s office and asking, “Hey did you get my email?”, and then watch it pop up on their screen! Ok, not really, but that happens to me exactly like that, fairly often.
    Yep, much of that stuff seems to be pervasive in almost every industry it sounds like. I guess at the root people are people regardless of their specialty for making a living.

    1. It’s true, people are people…and people will be people regardless of their industry. Whenever I was asked if I got the email, my immediate response was “Did you just send it?” If the answer was yes, I’d reply with “Okay, let me check”. 🙂

  10. I can feel and completely relate to your resignation letter. I too wonder how I will inform my employer.

    On a side note, I traveled a lot in the past with my job. My secret fantasy after an incredibly stressful week when I knew it was time to quit, would be to drive the rental car to the departure gate of the airport, leaving it running at the curb. I wouldn’t bother grabing my travel bag and simply walk to the gate. I would text a message to my boss stating I quit and mail the company phone back from the airport. 🙂

    “I don’t think I’m gonna go anymore….”, “I wouldn’t say I miss work…” – Office Space

    1. Ha! Yup, thanks Bryan – I am saddened that I can relate so well to Office Space, but I’m sure a lot of us share that particular quality if we work in corporate America.

      I wouldn’t say that I’ve been missing it, Bob. 🙂

  11. Dude, this might be the best thing I have ever read. You put into words pretty much everything I feel about corporate America. And it hits home with a lot of bureaucratic crap I am going through at work right now. It’s refreshing to know that I’m not the only one feeling this way. Luckily, you’re much closer to retirement than I am (and with junior on the way, I expect that to be pushed back a bit) but this type of letter keeps me going. I hate the fact that people think work = life. I work with so many people that are going to watch their entire lives go by because they are workaholics, and they put work before anything else. I can’t tell you how many managers work all day, then come home and work, then work on the weekends. All the while, they’re sending emails to their teams, making them feel as if they’re behind if they’re not doing the same thing. And for what? A paycheck for us to just go out and buy more stuff? It makes me sick.

    1. Totally, Chris – the whole work = life thing is definitely not something that I ever want to get myself involved with. I really, really don’t see that ever happening at this point. 😉

      Thanks again for the kind words!

  12. Love the sarcasm. Congrats on achieving financial freedom and best of luck on your trip. I’d like to see America, taking the time to appreciate our country.

    I actually enjoy working now for the most part after I figured out last July that I could call it quit anytime. Financial independence is a powerful thing. I’d probably remain parttime or something, unless we are blessed with a kid.

  13. Absolutely love it, every word resonated. Just goes to show the corporate world is the same everywhere. I now believe it is a game that is played and to not taking it so seriously.

    I am turning 61 in February 2017 and hope to be retired by then, just a couple of things holding me up. But I greatly admire what you are going to achieve so early in your life and I will send your links to my daughter to inspire her.

    Thanks Debbie

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